


Sorted

by ThatJungleCat



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Everyone Is Alive, Except JP, F/F, Grumpy Carmilla, Little shit Laf, Puppy Kirsch, Sassy Mattie, Sorry JP, Vampire Danny, if you squint real hard, sorta kinda fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-10
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-30 05:20:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8520058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatJungleCat/pseuds/ThatJungleCat
Summary: Laura comes home, her girlfriend is gone and there are some strange scorch marks on the coffee table...





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone. This is my first fic and I really hope I didn't screw up too badly (English isn't my mother tongue).  
> I just wanted to write something light and silly.  
> Carmilla is still a vampire and Mattie's still alive (undead?)

There was nothing Laura Hollis loved more in the world than going back to her apartment and snuggle with her girlfriend after a long day's work.  
Carmilla, despite her aloof mannerism and her snarky remarks, always made sure to greet her with a steaming cup of cocoa and a kiss. (Laura wasn't allowed to reveal that secret to their friends. Carmilla was blissfully unaware that they knew how smitten with Laura she was anyway).  
So when she didn't find her girlfriend and found no note on where Carmilla had gone, Laura started to wonder. After further inspection she found out that there was a strange, rectangular-shaped scorch mark on the coffee table and no sign of Carmilla's brand new laptop. And that the bed was still unmade, damn it, Carm. On her way back to the living room, Laura decided to text her missing girlfriend. All she got as an answer was _"With LaFonbrain. Be back soon"_ paired with a kiss emoji. _"Now **that** is strange"_ she thought. They were supposed to have dinner with the whole gang at LaF and Perry's that evening, despite Carmilla's protests and suggestion of staying in. Laura knew for a fact that her girlfriend wasn't a people person, so finding out that she had voluntarily gone to their friends early left her puzzled. She wasn't left to mull things over for long, though.  
Carmilla puffed in their living room in a cloud of smoke, a deep frown on her face. "Carm? Everything alright?". Laura asked. "And what's that piece of charred electronics that you're holding?". The vampire kept her gaze glued to the floor and didn't reply. "Carm?". Carmilla sighed. "I blew a stupid amount of money for that damn new laptop and ginger two can't fix it". She grumbled. "Wait. That... burnt thing you're holding is your brand new, custom made laptop? How did it end up like that? It worked just fine yesterday". The vampire growled lowly. "I know. Can we... not talk about this right now? Apparently Perry needs our help to get everything ready. And I... uhm... forget it, we just have to be there as soon as we can". To say that Laura was beyond confused would have been an understatement. Since when her lazy vampire girlfriend helped setting up their get togethers? Carmilla usually showed up at the last minute, when everyone, Laura included, was already there. To her defence, Carmilla always managed to bring a few bottles of wine every time. Laura had no doubt that getting those bottles wasn't cheap, or easy. Still, this new behaviour was very strange. "There's smoke coming out of your ears, cupcake". Carmilla chuckled. "Fine, you don't want to talk about it right now, but this isn't over, you grumpy cat". Laura said, her hands on her waist.  
Once they were ready to leave, Carmilla vanished in a puff of smoke, only to return ten minutes later with a toolbox under her arm. "Don't ask". She pleaded.

The drive to Perry's place was filled with a strange silence and the human kept thinking about the most disparate scenarios to explain her girlfriend's odd antics. Something was definitely amiss. Things became weirder when LaF greeted them with a glare. "No need to glare, braniac. I've bought what I previously damaged ". Carmilla said through gritted teeth as she handed them the toolbox. "Come in and don't make me regret helping you, fangs". They replied. "Hi frosh. I'm not supposed to tell you, but Perr made her infamous brownies. I'd leave some room for those if I were you". LaF whispered and winked with their good eye.  
They found Perry in the kitchen and she briefly greeted them before putting them all to work. Carmilla was put on kitchen duty while Laura and LaF set the table. The journalist and the scientist had been long banned from the kitchen for everyone's safety. Lafontaine for their habit of making things explode, and Laura because she managed to turn everything into a burnt mess. Five minutes in and the vampire earned herself a hit to her hand. She hissed loudly. "What did I do, Betty Crocker?". "Carmilla I saw that. Stop snacking behind my back" Perry said, twirling her wooden spoon. "Unless you want me to start serving garlic infused food". She smiled. Carmilla shuddered visibly. "You know, you're really scary sometimes, ginger one".

Preparations went on smoothly and soon the four of them were sitting on the couch, making small talk. Carmilla didn't say much, save for a couple of witty remarks, and neither she or LaF mentioned the laptop. It wasn't until after Danny, Kirsch and Mattie had arrived and everyone was well into their meal that the conversation went in that direction. "You and your temper, 'sis". Mattie smirked. "Wait. You set fire to your laptop? I thought it fried on its own, Carm!". "I'm insulted, frosh. That laptop was specifically designed for your temperamental girlfriend, made with the finest materials and assembled by these magic hands and this amazing brain". LaFontaine sulked. "This is golden" Danny giggled. "Shut up, Xena". Carmilla growled, showing her fangs. "Can you at least tell us what that poor laptop did to anger you so much?" Perry asked. "It didn't do things my way" Carmilla grumbled, her stare fixed on her glass of wine. "Wait. Carm? Is this because of that Pottermore thing? I thought you did the test again?". "I did. Got the same result". If she could blush, Carmilla would have been beet red.  
"Carm, come on. The sorting hat can make mistakes. There was no need to set your brand new laptop on fire. Besides, you and I know you are my badass, scary, uber cool Slytherin vampire girlfriend". Laura tried to pacify. "I took the damn test three more times! And I still got sorted in the same stupid house!". The vampire was beyond mortified.  
"Are you telling me that Elvira here didn't get sorted into Slytherin?" Danny all but howled. "What house did you get sorted into, fangface? Hufflepuff?". Carmilla didn't answer. Mattie and Danny were having a laughing fit. "I'm sorry sis but this is truly hilarious".  
"Hey, what's wrong with being a Hufflepuff? I'm a Hufflepuff". Kirsch said. "And we wouldn't have you any other way, sweetie". Perry smiled sweetly. "Gee, frosh, who knew you were way cooler than your undead sweetheart? Yo Fangs, is your patronus a cuddly, fuzzy bunny too?"  
Carmilla, who until that moment had kept her mouth shut and her stare cast down, jumped from her seat and turned mid-leap, letting out a blood curdling growl. LaF was in for the worst fifteen minutes of their life (freshman alchemy club incident excluded).

Two hours later Carmilla, still in her animal form and still sulking, was laying in her living room, her long tail shifting nervously from side to side. Mattie's cheetah was on her right, grooming her fur, and Danny was sitting in an armchair to her left, a little further away and beer in hand. "Hey Elvira, let me tell you a secret" She started before taking a long sip from her bottle. "I got sorted into Slytherin the first time I took the test. My reaction wasn't that different from yours, even though back then I couldn't set stuff on fire with just one look". Carmilla's ears twitched and Mattie went stock still. Danny's turning was still dangerous territory for everyone, even after five years of peace and quiet. Getting her back and earning her trust had been a long, painful task. Danny was still dealing with her regrets and struggling, even though her bad days had gotten rarer and happened farther apart. They were all still hurting and some of their battle wounds were still raw. Carmilla knew Perry still had nightmares and Danny still felt guilty for what she had done to Kirsch. She herself still felt the excruciating pain of Laura's loss, no matter how short it had been. She turned to Danny more fully. "What?". Carmilla huffed and got on her paws, stretching for a long moment before she made her way to the ginger vampire. She didn't shift back, she didn't trust her words. She just rubbed herself against Danny and purred lightly. "Yeah, me too Elvira, me too".

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this.  
> (I don't know if you noticed that I am a person of few words, but don't be shy and come talk to me. I actually like people)


End file.
